You hear a lot about resilient people, but what are they really like? Who are the resilient? How do they act? What can you expect from them? How do you know one when you meet one? Are they real? Are they superheroes? Do they really exist? Just who are they?
This is a complicated question. There is no profile of a resilient person or a resilient personality. There are some common characteristics that resilient people share. These characteristics show up in infancy and continue until adulthood. It is also possible to display resilient characteristics in one phase of development and not in another. Some characteristics, such as sociability, are stable throughout all phases of development. Other characteristics, such as the ability to control feeding behavior, are more specific to one developmental phase or another. One thing that resilient people do share, however, is the fact that they have overcome extreme or chronic stress or adversity. You may notice these characteristics in other people, however, if they have not overcome extreme or chronic stress or adversity they are not resilient.
People who overcome extreme or chronic stress or adversity display certain characteristics. These characteristics appear in infancy and continue through adulthood. To begin with infancy, resilient infants are active, energetic, and easy going. They can elicit positive responses from other people; they have an easy temperament (Gordon Rouse, in press; Werner and Smith, 1982). Resilient infants are socially responsive with a capacity to elicit and receive attention. No doubt they are active and more determined. They display more frustration tolerance, impulse control, and gratification delay than their non-resilient counterparts (Murphy and Moriarty, 1976). It seems they have a genetic makeup and neurochemistry that aid them (IMHI, 1991).
When they are toddlers, resilient children display an array of characteristics. Intelligence, autonomy, and sociability are present during the toddler years (Murphy and Moriarty, 1976; Werner and Smith, 1982). Their autonomy is tempered by adequate cooperation and compliance (Murphy and Moriarty, 1976). They are friendly, socially responsive, sensitive, and cooperative, with a positive sense of self (Garmezy, 1981; IMHI, 1991). They are also androgynous in that resilient toddler males have deeper affective expression, sociability, and demonstrativeness than non-resilient toddler males. Resilient toddler females are better coordinated, not as timid, and interested in environmental exploration; this makes them androgynous as well (Murphy and Moriarty, 1976; Werner and Smith, 1982).
During the middle childhood years, characteristics present in early childhood continue and others arise. Superior reasoning and problem solving continue (Dubow and Luster, 1990; Werner, 1989a; Werner, 1990). They also continue to demonstrate sociability, androgyny, and autonomy (Werner, 1989a; Werner, 1990). They have varied interests and hobbies that are not necessarily sex-typed (Werner, 1989a). They are guided by a more internal locus of control than their counterparts (Garmezy and Rutter, 1983; Werner, 1989a; Werner and Smith, 1982). They have a better self-concept than their counterparts (Dubow and Luster, 1990). They display high intellectual motivation and a probing drive to understand (Murphy and Moriarty, 1976). They also display mastery-oriented help-seeking behavior. That is, they mediate their own learning and problem-solving by taking the initiative to question, suggest, observe, and imitate (Nelson-Le Gall and Jones, 1991).
In adolescence, resilient children continue to show superiority over their non-resilient counterparts. Sociability, androgyny, and autonomy continue as does an internal locus of control (Garmezy, 1993; Garmezy and Rutter, 1983; Werner, 1989a; Luthar, 1991). They continue cognitive superiority (Dubow and Luster, 1990; Garmezy and Rutter, 1983; Werner and Smith, 1982); however, intelligence has been known to make them more sensitive (Luthar, 1991). They demonstrate academic behaviors by spending more time on homework and cooperating with their teachers (Lee, Winfield, and Wilson, 1991). They have a better self-concept (Cohen, Wyman, Work, and Parker, 1990; Dubow and Luster, 1990). They are less likely to commit delinquent acts or require the aid of mental health services and the females are less likely to become pregnant (Werner, 1989a; Werner and Smith, 1982). However, if the females become pregnant they can still exhibit resilience if they continue their education, obtain social support, and maintain high aspirations (Scott-Jones, 1991).
A myriad of characteristics are related to resilience. However, there are five that seem to show up consistently across the life span. These five are cognitive superiority, autonomy, androgyny, social skills, and internal locus of control. Fostering these five characteristics in children will be positively related to their resilience.
It is debatable whether intelligence is inherited or not. However, the latest infancy brain research probably exemplifies the importance of the environment (Shore, 1997). How a parent or caregiver interacts with an infant impacts his or her neural pathways. The environment continues to have an impact on intelligence throughout the rest of development (Steinberg and Meyer, 1995). What is still debatable is how much or what percentage of intelligence is influenced by the environment and what percentage is influenced by genes. However, it is important to consider how the environment can impact intelligence. This allows for parent or caregiver intervention.
In infancy, it is important to expose children to a variety of objects and environments. You can show them objects with bright colors, patterns, and contrasts. Talking to them and reading to them is very important, too, even though they may not be talking yet. Talking to them helps them learn preverbal skills and the rules related to language. Once they begin talking you can help them develop by extending their utterances. If they say "more milk" you can say something like, "would you like some more cold, white milk"? This helps infants' understanding of language develop as well as their language skills. Reading to children helps them to become interested in print. Simple picture books are appropriate at this age.
Cognitive superiority can be fostered during subsequent years of development as well. In the preschool years, children can be exposed to reading, hands-on science and mathematics, and more advanced language. You can also play memory games and simple classification games. Children will continue to love being read to, but they can also read themselves and read to you. The counting and measuring of objects help with math and science. Listening to adult speech helps advance their language. Remembering which cards are where in a pile and grouping (classifying) objects by size, shape, color, and function all help cognition develop.
Later on, exposing children to academic subjects advances their cognition. Parents can help by assisting children with homework. However, cognition can be exercised out of the classroom as well through reading books and playing games. Games that foster memory, strategies, planning, or classification (grouping) all help develop cognition.
Autonomy is the ability and desire to accomplish tasks on one's own. It is important to one's social development. It naturally develops as early as toddlerhood. However, it can be fostered by giving children tasks to complete on their own at a time when they are ready for the task. Encouragement and repetition of tasks such as simple puzzles allow a young toddler to learn the process and eventually complete it independently. In toddlerhood, hand washing and putting away toys are appropriate autonomy fostering activities. When children are thirteen they can be expected to complete major tasks such as fixing dinner or cutting the grass. People who are autonomous think for themselves and make their own decisions. Autonomy is related to resilience.
Androgyny is displaying characteristics that are thought to be female and characteristics that are thought to be male at the appropriate time. It is a transcendence of one's typical gender role and display of behavior that corresponds to the opposite gender. Androgyny is related to resilience. Resilient children display androgyny by participating in non-sexed typed activities. The males are more affective and the females are more adventurous. This type of behavior can be allowed by caregivers. It can also be modeled. Parents can display androgyny as can other caregivers. This will help foster androgyny, which is related to resilience. Children who learn to play with all types of toys and games tend to be more resilient.
Social skills are important for resilience. They can be fostered by creating an environment where all children are accepted. Including special needs children in activities helps all children with social skills. These social skills can be encouraged and supported throughout childhood by exposing children to others with a variety of backgrounds. Guest speakers in the classroom, visits to a nursing home, and tours of a hospital all give children exposure to differences and helps them with their social skills. A socially skilled person can interact with other people. They are pro-social and sensitive to the emotions of others. Pro-social behavior such as sharing and telling the truth can be modeled and rewarded, as can sensitivity to others' emotions. Social skills include a wide range of abilities. Fostering these abilities can in turn foster resilience.
Internal locus of control is related to resilience. People with an internal locus of control believe they have influence over their own fate. They believe they have some control over what happens to them. The opposite is an external locus of control. These people believe that powerful or unknown others influence their fate. An internal locus of control can be fostered by having people, even children, participate in activities where they have control over the outcome. It helps if these activities are meaningful and related to the person's life. For instance, infants can be allowed to feed themselves and toddlers to dress themselves. It also helps if they are successful at these tasks. After the task is complete it is helpful to demonstrate just how they completed it on their own and relied on their own skills and abilities to achieve the outcome.
These five characteristics are related to resilience in children. Suggestions for fostering resilience have been given. Hopefully, they are helpful to you as you work with children in impoverished and stressful situations.